Family
For a newly married husband and wife team, being married, without children borders on being in paradise. You can do whatever you want whenever you want, make last minute decisions to get up and go. While away from home on a trip, you can make a last minute decision to stay away one or two more days. The refrigerator contents don’t always represent healthy food options. You can decide to eat out as much as you want to or go visit relatives for dinner whenever you want to.
Other areas of the new partnership can also be affected by personal choices. As an example if you live in a big city you may decide not to own a car and use public transportation or on the opposite end you might decide to drive a two passenger sports car. Some very healthy people might even decide to walk or bike everywhere. Did I forget motorcycles, of course they are also an option and not always for recreation use only?
Your list of priorities is different as night and day when married and prior to having children. When the husband and wife first find out they are going to be proud parents, they might even daydream of all the fun they will have with a little mini-me to share the house with.
Eventually reality sets in and you start considering all the things you have to do to feather the nest. Things that need to change might start with; maybe a bigger house or apartment, trading the sporty car for a four door sedan or minimally an SUV, long before the baby arrives you start eating healthier, the refrigerator contents are hardly recognizable, your unplanned outings are now walks in the park or even the mall for exercise. Start planning for the nursery, baby furniture (perhaps, previously vacation money). Ever so slowly the real life you deserve begins to take shape (I mean this in a good way).
I for one found as the family grew that instead of time for golf, I was developing businesses that would support, and magnify our family enterprise (raising a family). I learned early on that trading labor hours for dollars (second job), doesn’t get you out of a financial hole, it just slows the rate at which you keep digging ever deeper. When I say better lucky than good, I am talking about the final outcomes that I know included as much faith, opportunity and effort (with a pinch of luck). Having said that mouthful, I haven’t yet given the credit for the 60 to 70 percent participation that my wife contributed to the family enterprise (family life in general and raising the kids in particular). There is no way that I wouldn’t recognize the fact that my wonderful partner is in big part the reason everything worked out so well, and continuous to go well. You might be revisiting your family formative years in your mind as you read this. If you want to share feel free to comment or otherwise contribute.
Now that the children are all grown up and have moved on, I get asked periodically, if we ever suffer from the empty nest syndrome; my favorite response is hell no, it’s party time!! We actually feel like we are in a courtship that was temporarily interrupted, by the real purpose of life. The best is yet to come….
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