Caught in the Middle
I’ve served my time at getting caught between, being there
for my gracefully aging parents while meeting the demands of my own children
growing up. Well, it has now been more
than a dozen years since my parents went to be with the lord. I’ve enjoyed the relief that comes with
knowing that that they are free of their aches and pains and in a better place
all together.
Now enough time has gone by and it pains me to see my
children begin to struggle with the realities of aging in-laws. Our children are fortunate that their parents
(us/we) are healthy and enjoying life to the fullest with minimal discomfort. As with most people when young couples meet
and marry they have no way of foreseeing what awaits at the end of the line.
One rule of thumb that I strongly believe in and promote
is: get to know the family before you
get married, especially the older family members (particularly) the parents, because
what you see is what you get. Many times
children have a way of mirroring their parents.
There are many exceptions to be sure, many children turn out great
despite their parents and upbringing.
Can’t move on without mentioning that some relationships will be great, just because
the people involved are so special to each other.
This writing comes to be because I am seeing one of my
children struggle with the emotions of dealing with an in-law that is
struggling with serious (possibly terminal) health issues. I wish I could be more helpful, but every
situation is different and I am not close enough to the developing situation to
know what to say. I do offer my support
and understanding as much as I am allowed without intruding.
I am willing to bet that I am not the only one and that this situation is not unique. This scenario
must play out time and again all over the world. It just hurts to witness it affecting people
that I love.
Life is not discriminating when it comes to love and
suffering, sooner or later we all come to that intersection of life. The best is yet to come……
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